On Minivans

The minivan is, has been, and always will be an irredeemably uncool vehicle.  And I say this as a man who aspired to own one for about six years before finally being able to justify buying one a few years ago.  I drove a 2007 Honda Odyssey daily for three years, and have since relinquished the keys to Lori.  I loved driving it, I love owning it, I'm glad we have it.  It's the perfect vehicle for our family at this stage of life.  It's not my dream car, but it's a utilitarian slam-dunk.

As I see more and more of the new Odysseys on the road, I am increasingly puzzled.  Does Honda think they can suddenly make the minivan sexy by adding some flare to the profile and featuring it in commercials that lean heavily on pyrotechnics, a panther, and a Marshall stack or pander to suburban parents' unspoken sexual fantasies?  C'mon.  I won't pretend to speak for minivan drivers everywhere, but I strongly prefer the blandness of the previous body style, or the current Sienna, to this try-hard nonsense.  

So what if the Odyssey becomes the sexiest minivan on the market?  That's like being the sexiest girl at band camp.  It may be worth something, but it ain't worth much.  And I don't care what she can so with her flute.